Haiz~ i still not sure towards the decision i make. Do i really want to join or not?? I think he's getting the idea that i join. When there's training , he'll tell me and ask me to go. I bet he's very pissed with me already. I didn't attend two training already leh~ i just kinda lazy to go training and i'm not really in the mood yet. It started like this. On 9/6 - Wednesday , i was online in Facebook and he came and chat with me. He : Jing Wei Me : Yes? He : Can i put your name in intersquad? Me : Huh? Intersquad? He : Yes. It's a competition Me : er.. is it compulsory?? He : you can make your own desicion. Me : er.. i think can gua~ He : ok. good good. Well , that time i didn't even ask my mum about this but high possibility she'll agree de. But , who knows? Then , he told me got training on Saturday , but i didn't attend because i'm just being sooo lazy! Holiday go training?? Aiyo~ Then , on 16/6 - Wednesday i was online-ing in Facebook again. Same thing happen~ He : Jing wei Me : Yes? He : Tomorrow got training at Taman. 8 - 12.30 pm. Me : Huh? i dun really know whether i can go or not wo~ He : It's compulsory. Me : Compulsory a? He : Yes. Me : er.. what IF i cannot come at the last minute leh? He : what can i do?? i keep organizing training but very little people come. Me : Huh? er.. ok lar~ He : good I also dunno why i answer "ok lar~". After i say that i really regret already. I felt like dun want go. But i said "ok lar~" already wo~ like this i have to lie lor. Haiz~ i'm not busy or anything just that one word can describe me , LAZY! I know that's not a reasonable reason for me not to attend training but i also not really in the mood to go training. If school start , got training , i would go~ but not now~! Then , Wednesday night i sms him and says that i cannot attend tomorow's training. I also did say sorry~ that time it's really late already , about 11.45 like this. before that Carl Men and Jie Yin got call me. Carl Men ask me whether i got go training or not. I say i'm not sure yet because i really not sure whether i want to go or not~! After that , Jie Yin called. She keep asking me to go! but i keep saying no. I told her the reasons why i don't want go training. She says i'm the Secretary and i should go. She also told me many more things but still i said no. Sorry ya Jie Yin for never go training. Then , at the same time i was sms-ing with Nicholas. He asked me whether i want to go training or not. That time i still not sure. Then , i also told him , if i don't want go , then i have to lie already because at first i told him "ok lar". He says that it's not a lie , it's a white lie because it doesn't hurt his heart. But still is a lie ma~! and now , at last i didn't go. I'm feeling a bit scared already. I bet his really pissed with me already! first say yes but last minute say no. Haiz~ i'm really sorry. =(